How to Conquer Intimidating Goals

"Oh that would be too hard for me -- I could never learn to do that."

We've all heard these words... you may even have said them yourself. Tackling new skills can feel intimidating. But we only feel intimidated because we overestimate the task and underestimate our own abilities. We aren't confident enough in our natural abilities. Take learning to drive for example.

Today, millions of very mentally un-gifted people got into automobiles and drove them. And most of them had no accident today. So how hard can it be?




What have you been holding yourself back from doing? No, you don't have to list EVERYTHING you're putting off. Just take the top one.

#1

Whatever it is, write it down on a piece of paper.

#2

Now think of somebody who isn't particulary smart, but who is now doing the very thing you want to do.

Been putting off learning to drive? Look at all the idiots on the road who somehow manage to get from here to there without wrecking the countryside.

What about marriage? True, most people botch it completely, but many millions actually do get it right and live in happiness.

Or maybe you're putting off starting your own business. Same thing -- you've met people barely clever enough to get in out of the rain, but they have businesses. And they haven't gone bankrupt -- at least not yet.

Chances are, the one thing you're lacking is not intelligence, nor ability, nor talent. Training is no real stumbling block, either, since people regularly go get the same training you're wanting.

No, you're probably only lacking permission. You're waiting around for somebody to validate you, then pick you up and prove to you that you can do it.

It ain't gonna happen that way. The good news is, it doesn't HAVE to happen that way.

All it takes is just deciding you'll do it. Then just begin.

Several years ago someone told me a great two-step formula for success in any field.

Step one is start; step two is don't stop.

So we come to...

#3

Make a beginning, no matter how awkward, then just keep moving forward in the direction you want to go.

Honestly, it's just about that simple.

While great intelligence can make things simpler, it can also make things much more difficult if you never learn to use it FOR yourself instead of against.

Please notice that beginnings are almost always awkward. That's okay. Give yourself permission to be a beginner when you begin. And if you feel a compulsion to be perfect, then just be a perfect beginner.

But do keep moving... forward.

Overcome Shyness And Gain Confidence

Winning the battle with shyness takes some work, but is definitely well worth the effort as the result is increasing confidence and self esteem. Wake up feeling good about yourself, able to face the world with confidence and security and the knowing that no feeling of shyness can come in your way of achieving your desires.



1. Every morning, as soon as you get up, get in front of a mirror and say out loud "I feel terrific! I feel terrific! I feel terrific!" Repeat this affirmation with enthusiasm at least ten times everyday until it's ingrained into your subconscious mind. If feel a little self conscious to begin with lock yourself in the bathroom. The results will amaze you.

2. Feel good about yourself. Look your best. Dress up more often. This gives you an extra feeling of confidence and self esteem. On its own just knowing that you look good will boost your confidence and reinforce with others that there are things about you that are worth getting to know.

3. Take a risk at least once a day. It's very invigorating and conquering fears by taking risks helps you grow in confidence and self esteem. Start with small risks and fears and as you overcome them move onto bigger things. There's nothing you cannot do. Be confident in knowing that change can only help you grow, and boost your self confidence.

4. When you are engaged in a one to one conversation, or with a larger group of people, let them know that you're shy. This prevents them from misreading you and they are far more likely to invite you into the conversation rather than leave you just listening and wishing you could contribute.

Many people, me included, find following a conversation in a noisy room difficult. If you are having difficulty say so and move so that you can hear. People respect honesty, and vulnerability and you will attract more honest people into your life as a result.

5. Rejection is a fact of life that everyone experiences. It is rarely you that is being rejected. If you are rejected, for example if you ask someone for a date, remember that everyone has different likes and dislikes. You may be attracted to one type of person and not others. The same applies to other people and you are probably just not their type. That does not devalue you in any way. Accept this and know that you will get over it. Never take it personally and keep in mind that if people reject you it is because of their own likes and dislikes and not because of who you are. You are equally entitled to reject others because of your likes and dislikes.

6. Engage in an activities that make you feel excited and good about yourself or start a hobby that gives you a feeling of relaxation. This could be anything from gardening to Tai Chi to Karate. Take some lessons, learn or master a musical instrument or take singing lessons. Do something that excites you and take a risk. Exploring things that make you feel excited is a great antidote for shyness.

Motivate Yourself Today

Why do you want to motivate yourself?


7 Ways To Motivate Yourself

 1. Explain your plans. Usually, by the time I tell my wife about the newsletter I'm going to write, I'm out of my slump and back at the keyboard. Find someone that listens well, and tell them what you want to do. If it is something that you really want, this will almost always get you motivated.

 2. Stimulate desire. Imagine the rewards of your effort clearly. Imagination motivates many to sign up for get-rich-quick plans. Good salesmen can have you living in your imagined dream home in minutes, and you'll feel motivated to do anything to make it real. Just learn to be your own salesman.

 3. Use pain. Neuro-Linguistic Programming teaches you to link pain with not acting. If you imagine a scene of your kids sitting in jail for drug use - that might motivate you to have that talk you've been avoiding. Linking pleasure and rewards to acting is only half of the formula. Remember to link pain to not acting.

 4. Develop a true interest. If you have no interest at all, it might mean you need to do something else, but if it's just a task you dislike, relate it clearly in your mind to the greater goal. I don't like to drive, but when I remember those mountains I'm going to, I get motivated to drive.

 5. Create energy. Coffee can help for a while, but one way or another, you need to have some energy to have motivate yourself. Exercise, sleep well, and watch out for sugary foods - the "sugar blues" will kill your motivation.

 6. Have the proper mental state. It's rare to be depressed and motivated. Resolve some of your negative feelings, and you'll have more motivation. Another way is to do your important work when you are in a better mood.

 7. Make any small step. Commit to raking up one bag of leaves, and soon you'll want to finish the yard. Any small step towards your goals creates momentum.

You have seven ways now, but you have to actually  use them, so how do you get motivated to do that? You have to figure that one out yourself. Humor, by the way, can be a good motivator. Laughing often breaks up the feeling of being overwhelmed. There's your eighth way to motivate yourself.

The First Step To Success - Motivation

You will unquestionably have dreams. Whether you dream of having the perfect house with the perfect car, or you dream of settling down to have a family, even if you dream of retiring by the time you're 40, the one key to success is doing something about it. It may sound obvious but if you dream of retiring before you reach 40 and yet you aimlessly skip from job to job with no hope of progressing a career, it is very unlikely you will achieve your goal.

Set goals and ambitions and write them down on a piece of paper. Make sure that you are always striving to reach those goals. Sometimes it can be difficult to get the motivation you require in order to succeed at your goals but you can use the goals themselves as the motivation you require. Keep your piece of paper on you and if you are beginning to feel downbeat or skeptical about your goals then look at your piece of paper and remember why you are pushing yourself.

Structuring your life in this way, may seem like it loses its spontaneity but that doesn't have to be the case. Find a career you like, set up a business, and have fun doing it but always remember that if a good opportunity crops up you should take it with both hands. It is worse not to try something and not know whether it would have been successful than it is to never try anything.

Presuming you have set reasonable goals you should always be able to see a way to fulfill them. If you set goals that are too difficult you will find it incredibly difficult if not completely impossible to meet your goals. You should try not to alter them if possible, however, we don't know what's around the corner so we can't always plan for it. Don't see this as a failure but take the opportunity to reassess your goals and keep going.

Motivation is Consistency in Action

We all exercise for the results.  Different people are looking for different results or outcomes.  Goals vary from weight loss, athletic performance, endurance, strength, toning, body building to more flexibility, etc.

Exercise with a friend.  Try working out with a friend, spouse, or co-worker.  It’s harder to skip a workout if you know someone is counting on you. The buddy system brings a social element to exercise which makes it more fun.

Go for a New Goal.  An initial goal sets a foundation in which future training goals are based.  Setting a goal, such as entering a 5K race or rock climbing, may never have entered your mind.  But after your initial goal is met, you will see new, interesting, and fun adventures in fitness you never thought possible.

Change it Up.  Just a slight variation can take you to a new level in your workout.  We use periodized training, a systemized approach involving progressive cycling of various aspects of training protocol, in 6 week intervals to avoid plateaus, boredom and for maximum effect.  If you feel you are at a stand still, train three times a week for 3-4 weeks and experience the difference.

Treat Yourself.  A heart-rate monitor, jump rope, Physioball, medicine ball, and other exercise equipment can help you work out more effectively and make your workouts more fun and challenging. Try adding a sport to your activities instead of always working out in the gym.

Try Something New.  Personal trainers will challenge you with exercises you’ve never tried before.  Training with different trainers also provides variety plus you learn from the experience of a team of trainers.  If you always walk on a treadmill, try riding an exercise bike or an elliptical trainer.  If you always lift with machines, try free weights instead.

Track Your Progress.  Keep an exercise log.  This will help you track your goals, monitor your progress and adjust your routine as necessary.  Occasionally, test your maximum strength to determine your progress in total strength.  By using a ten rep strength test, see how much weight you can bench press and leg press in ten reps. Use your first measurement of weight and reps as a benchmark and every three to four months, retest your strength.

Reward Yourself.  When you reach a goal or milestone, treat yourself to something special – a massage, an evening out, new clothes or some other indulgence.  Studies show rewards are a key to staying motivated.

Remember the Benefits.  You know how good and healthy you feel after a workout?  Make a mental note of that feeling.  Use that memory to motivate yourself the next time you’re thinking of blowing off your workout.

Go Easy on Yourself.  Stuff happens – doctor’s appointments, sick kids, illnesses.  Don’t let a few missed workouts turn into a month of unfulfilled resolutions and move you further away from your goals.
Plan and be Ready to Exercise.  Schedule your workouts like you schedule meetings and doctor appointments.  Write your exercise time in your palm pilot or day planner. Pack you duffle bag with your gym clothes the night before you go to work or school. Or have an extra duffle bag in the car ready to go just in case you forget your gym clothes.

Get Motivated Today

I want to give you four wonderful tips for motivation, four main themes to underpin a healthy sense of drive and inspiration.

- The first main tip of motivation is to gain recognition from peers.

When soldiers in wartime give up their lives during combat, why do they do it? Is it because of patriotism, a belief in the cause they are fighting for, or a fear of court martial if they do otherwise? Perhaps all these things play a part, but extensive research has shown that what really motivates a soldier to fight well incombat is the desire for the respect of the person who is fighting right beside him. This is much more important than medals or other forms of public recognition. This is similar to what motivates salesmen on the floor of a car dealership, students in a classroom or a team of lawyers trying to win a case.

In the NFL,  all the players will tell you the best award that they want to receive is the acclaim of the others players and to receive the players player of the year award.

Think of ways that you can develop recognition from your peers to enhance your motivation. The apply them to your life.

- The second tip of motivation is recognition from respected experts or authorities.

In my own life, I love the fact that the wonderful multi-selling author in the US has helped me, guided me and become my friend professionally and personally. I desperately wanted to earn his respect.

Has there been someone like that in your life? It is important to realise that a respected expert does not have to be someone who is known far and wide throughout the world. You are the one who establishes the qualifications, though very often people whom you find impressive will be equally impressive to others.

Once you've met such a person, or even if you have just seen them from a distance or perhaps read an article about them, stop hesitating and politely approach them and introduce yourself. Unless you happen to catch them at a particularly difficult moment, most successful people are eager to help others and to pass on what they've learned.

The great thing about establishing a relationship with a mentor is that you eventually come close to that person that you can sometimes hear them advising you when they are not actually around.

Think about how you can get recognition from a respected expert or authority. You can really stretch this concept to be good parents, local teachers, councillors as well as business people; interpret this in the best way for you.

- The third tip of motivation is family.

Although the approval of peers and experts may be important to your career, in your life, nothing compares to the influence of your family.

Let me explain what I mean by this with an example of my own; when I had come off stage speaking at an event in Florida last year, a man approached me and asked me for some advice on the best way to stop smoking, he knew that I was the author of The Secrets of Self-Hypnosis and wanted assistance. My immediate response was to ask him what his reasons were for wanting to stop smoking and he said the following to me:

"My wife is pregnant with our first child and I want to have more after that. I want to be able to enjoy playing and having fun with my children and I want to be a healthy influence on their lives too."

I spent some time talking to him about some specific techniques and strategies. I have not heard from that man, but I know that he was driven by his family and am sure of his success. Think about your wealth goals; so many of us want to be able to rpovide for our family and for them to have what they want.

So think about the ways in which you your fmaily can motivate you and get that lodged into your mind.

- The fourth tip of motivation for today is something closely related to number three and that is sharing the wealth and wisdom for the good of your fellows.

To illustrate this pillar, I am going to mention a story I love about Andrew Carnegie, the Scottish immigrant who founded the United States Steel Company in the early nineteen hundreds. When Carnegie died, a yellow sheet of paper was found in his desk on which he had written a note to himself when he was in his twenties. This note illustrated the main purpose of his life. It read:

"I am going to spend the first half of my life accumulating money, and I am going to spend the last half of my life giving it all away."

During his lifetime, Carnegie's fortune was estimated a four hundred and fifty million dollars - the equivalent to four and a half billion dollars today. In addition to building Carnegie Hall in New York City, he founded libraries in hundreds of small towns all across America and participated in dozens of other philanthropic activities as well.

When we look at these found pillars of motivation, what do you really see? The thing that I immediately notice is that they all involve other people, whether they are peers, mentors, family members, or simply fellows of the human race.